What I haven't done.

I need a type thingy in the car when I am thinking of these things. Here are the things I haven't done and will probably not do, as a refelction of my big failure in life...
Write a novel,
Run a marathon (with a decent time, mind you)
Play professional piano (in any capacity that involves performing adequately and earning money),

Damn - there was something else. A #4.

Oh well. the first two are a reflection of what is going on right now. Haven't been able to tackle the story part and it seems as if I have quickly given up on National Novel Writing Month. 3000 words of bullshit - just couldn't keep going.
The NYC marathon just passed, abd I don't even run anymore.
And of course I don't really practice very much piano.

There are probably many other things - too many national Parks and other places I will never visit. Walk the Appalachian Trail. A few things I dare not mention (who knows who can break in and read this). Want to excel at some sport. Make a large amount of money in one shot, be recognized for an achievement.

I never felt I had a dream come true and I never felt I ever had anyone support me in achieving a dream. My life is one big failure. I know people will disagree, because they feel like they have to trivialize things and cut me off but that is because other people apply their own values to me.

In going thru some old stuff I came to realize that I am at a lower point in my career than I ever was. I was doing better stuff 15 years ago then I am now.